I’ve been wanting to get back into painting abstracts, but for some reason I’ve been struggling to do so. It’s like there’s been a black cloud over my head when it comes to abstract painting.
I’ve missed the days when I would wake up, and go straight to my studio to paint an abstract in my art journal. I tried restarting my morning art page routine a couple times over the summer, but it didn’t stick.
I made some hideous looking abstracts that I still don’t like (above photo), and I struggled the entire time. My work had no flow. I couldn’t get into the groove. I had so many starts & stops that I ended up not wanting to try anymore. I put my abstract journal up on the shelf, so I wouldn’t have to look at it anymore.
Why can’t I paint abstracts like this every day?
I LOVE these two pages
When I’m in the “zone” painting abstracts, it’s almost like there’s a blank page, and then there’s a finished piece in front of me – just like that! Super simple, effortless & easy. It’s like someone waves a magic wand, puts me into a trance-like state, and the piece creates itself.
If you’ve ever experienced creating art like this, I’m sure you’ll agree – it’s quite magical, and not to be taken for granted because it’s fleeting. Once it goes away, it’s almost impossible to get it to return.
After several months of failure, and having lost complete sight of the zone, I convinced myself that wasn’t going to happen again any time soon..maybe never again. The struggle was here to stay.
Finished art journal
full of portrait paintings
I decided that instead of forcing things, and being frustrating with myself, I would fill a thick art journal with portraits (which I DO like). I blew through this art journal quickly, and when I finished, I was back in that in-between space of limbo – not knowing what to do next. Kinda like when you finish reading a book, and you need some time to process it before starting a new one.
Part of me wants to continue portrait painting in a new art journal (I couldn’t stand being idle, so I already started) and another part of me is thinking about giving abstracts a go again (hm…might I be losing my mind?).
I’m hoping that writing about my aversion to abstract painting will get me back in the swing of things. We’ll see if it works.
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