It was time to let go

SOLD
Give me a Sign
Small to large prints available HERE

I’ve had this piece in my personal collection for many years, but I recently listed it for sale on Etsy. It sold a couple days ago, and was shipped off to its new home in NYC this morning. It was bitter sweet to see it go off in my postman’s black gloved hand, and I teared up watching him leave. It was hard not to run to the door screaming “stop stop!!”, but I knew if I could just get through a couple seconds he would start his mail truck, and drive away. I held my breath, waited, and sure enough..she was gone. 

This painting has deep sentimental value to me because I painted it when my mom was still alive, and fighting cancer. I started painting masked heroes when she was diagnosed because I thought if anyone could help save Mom, superheroes could. Being over 1500 miles away, feeling helpless, frightened, and not knowing what to do with myself, I painted and painted, as her cancer spread and spread. It didn’t help her in the least, but painting the superhero series helped me get through this very difficult time. Maybe they got the info wrong, and were trying to save me, instead of her?  

Having this last painting sell, and holding it in my hands for the final time was difficult. I sat and stared at the painting for a long time. It brought back so many memories, and it broke my heart all over again. I procrastinated getting the painting ready to ship out. Just a little longer, I kept thinking. It’s my last day with her, so just a few more minutes. It was the same bargaining I was doing when I sat next to my Mom in the hospital, holding her hand, as she took her last breaths. Please, just one more second, minute, hour, day.. until it was too late, and she was gone. 

All day yesterday, I contemplated canceling the sale, and keeping the painting, but I knew that wasn’t going to change anything. It wasn’t going to bring my Mom back. It was time to let go. And so I did. 

I love you, Momma..”up to the sky and back down to the ground, and all around the world again and again…forever, and ever.” xo